Hoarse

Excercising a horse. Isn't that just a fancy way of saying "riding" it whenever the hell I want to? Woohoo! I'm excited. And Steph better be, or I'll punch her. Horses AND a trampoline. The things I do for her...Not that I mind. You catch that Steph?! Huh? Did you?

*sigh*

But I'm still lonely. Sure, there are all kinds of people back in town now, just not the ones I want to be back in town. Like, the entire department minus my best friends. Maybe I've just been kidding myself all summer. Its not my friends I miss...its just two of them. I'm a bad person. Pfft. Whatever dude.

So, three years doesn't really matter. Highschool/College is the relevant transition. Doesn't matter what the age difference is, what matters, is the difference between highschool graduation and the first semester of higher education. It just sort of happens. People suddenly don't care about most of the stupid shit they used to care about. No, thats not right. Its just that the manner of dealing with it is different. And slightly more mature. I guess. And nobody is ever going to understand that until they make the transition themselves. You can't explain it, you can't prevent it, its just the way it is.

I've read so many different "coming of age" stories (Catcher in the Rye, A Separate Peace, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, To Kill a Mockingbird) and they all portray the age of coming, as it were, as somewhere between 15 and 18. Like it just stops after that. Like there are no more truly life-changing realizations after that singular turning point. Like your entire young life leads up to that one epiphany, and you are supposed to live your remaining years with the grasp you gain on the rest of your life. Thats like premature ejaculation...what are you supposed to do, ride through the rest of your life, slowly going limp, trying to pretend it didn't happen to avoid embarassment? So then what is left after that singular epiphany? I have yet to read The Multiple Orgasms of Personal Growth, leading to the question, do multiple realizations happen, or does the ceaseless search for answers turn into perpetual masturbation with no payoff?